I remain confused and anxious about my career and boys. I look forward to escaping from the pressures of both next week during my vacation. But, everything and everyone will be awaiting resolution when I get back. I just need to focus on giving 100% and staying positive and hopeful.
Hope is so important.
I guess I should write more but I worry about giving too much information about my feelings given that a few of my coworkers read my blog and that Floyd may still read my entries. I believe in full-discloure and don't like the idea of censoring my own blog. But I wonder how open I can really be on a blog that is read by people I see everyday and by people that I truly care about. I don't want to offend, hurt or give anyone ammunition to use against me. I guess I don't like the idea of being so open with others.
So, I'll remain vague about some of my concerns in my blog--at least for now. I have my paper journal to disclose the "real" stuff anyway.
By the way, I broke my agreement and called Floyd. The conversation was okay until he accused me of being selfish. Then, things degraded. I knew I was being selfish, but I didn't care. I just wanted to get quick advice from him without opening things up any further. Yes, it was selfish and I now know that I need to find a new source for quick advice without all the drama.