P&C no more

I’m feeling much better today after a rather crazy weekend.

Once again, I’ll say that I don’t regret anything that happened over the weekend. I made choices that felt right at the time. They may have been bad or good choices, but they were mine to make. I do wish that I had more fully thought out my actions and the consequences. Yet, even then, I probably would have made the same choices and still hurt my best friend.

So, Floyd is no longer talking to me and has basically written me out of his life. I’m gonna miss him so much and I will never forget the terms upon which our relationship ended. I hope that one day we can be friends because we have so much history, both good and bad times. He knows me more than anyone on this planet and I’m quite saddened to know that he’ll no longer be apart of my life and I’ll no longer be a part of his life. I’ll be lonely without my DCBFF.

But I’m hopeful. I’ve always believed that things happen for a reason. Life provides opportunities and you make choices. Whether the choice is good or bad, you learn a bit more about yourself as a result. I learned a bit more about my values and beliefs as a result of this weekend. I also learned how vulnerable and human I am. I learned that Floyd still cares, as do I. Yet, I guess, I’m moving on.

I fear to speak of the guy I met because I think Floyd might still read this blog, at least for a little bit to make sure that I’m doing okay.

I’ll only say that he’s really nice and I like him a lot. But who knows if I actually like him or am just super relieved to have someone interested in me…or just desperate for something positive to come out of this situation. More on this later, I guess.

Farewell my sweet Floyd, my dear DCBFF. We had an amazing, tumultuous, fun, loving, crazy seven years together. I never imagined that such a day would come, but it has. I regret hurting you and ending our relationship on such unsavory terms. But I respect and accept your reaction and decision to say goodbye for good.

I love you and wish you well.