6.17.2009

Final Hippo-Floyd Saga Update

I feel the need to send out an update to my loyal readers after my last blog.

I am doing fine. I was obviously very emotional on Sunday and Monday, but now I am doing better. I am in the same state I was before Floyd visited, but now the reality that there is no us is a bit more vivid in my mind, which is good. The perk is that now whenever I think about him or am tempted to contact him, I remember the revelation he shared on Sunday. He is ready to date again, specifically a woman who lives in Fairfax. That keeps me from fantasizing about how I can get him back and reminds me that I can’t be his friend (someone who’s happy that he’s found someone new) until I get over him. He won the “breakup contest” and that adds a wound to my vanity as well as my heart. I need to start healing both now.

This is my last post about Floyd. There is nothing else to write about that I haven’t already shared. And he’s no longer in my life. Hopefully, one day we’ll be friends and he will read my blog again (with my blessing) and I will write about how great of friends we are. But until then, there is no need.

Instead, I want to write about the awesomeness of my work and social lives---things are really good. It’s crazy that as soon as I start excelling and find peace in the other parts of my life, my love life falls apart.

I look forward to when I can finally write about a happy and exciting dating/love life. I must admit that Organica’s excitement about being young and single is intoxicating. She is right that the time to get out, explore and have fun is now. I don’t want to regret not living it up more in my twenties. Now without Floyd, I have the ability to do whatever I want without having to worry about what Floyd would say or what it means in terms of a relationship with him. I can date/love/fool around with anyone. I can pack up and move across the country or world whenever I want. It is scary but exhilarating to be so free.

I think Organica’s youthful optimism about love and boys is just the perspective I need to hear this summer, as I work to finally move on and reestablish myself as Hippo + none.

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